If I were only _______ (insert descriptive word)then I'd be really happy!

Si yo fuera.... In language we'd call this the subjunctive tense. We use it in English but rarely understand what it implies. I've spent entire rides and races in mind frame of doubt and negativity; perhaps this propelled me to suffer even deeper. Or did is hinder my ability and performance? Of course being our own worst critics helps motivate our desires to perfect, improve and refine our performance. By comparing ourselves to others we see both the best and worst of competition. Only in the brotherhood/sisterhood of cycling could one take lightly the taunt of "ripping your legs off". Sounds more like horrid scenes from the Spanish Inquisition. We are eternally stuck living in a paradox. (Not with a pair of OX!) Our performance is always good enough and at the same time we can always do better. Both are true. Subjunctive is to wish or hope; nothing wrong with wishing on the first star and I still toss a penny into all awaiting fountains and regard my kids hopes with total sincerity. But does hoping and wishing prevent us from enjoying the Preciousness of the Present? Every get to the bottom of a ripping descent and realize you spent the majority of it thinking about work, family, the size of your calves, etc.? If you're on the dirt...do it over. If on the road, well better luck next time. As we approach "Grasshopper Season" I know what's going on out there... lots of miles, gym time, hill repeats, leg elevation, late nights with Phil Ligget and online shopping for lighter wheels, shoe covers and the ultimate recovery drink. Don't not do these things (Double negative means keep it up!) You know everyone else is and we want some stiff competition as usual. Besides covering the costs of Kim making the cards there has never been and never will be any charge for these rides. This year I'd like to ask everyone to remember how fortunate we are to be able to do what we love. Please take a look at the Ross Dillon page. I know he would be out here riding with us today if he could. Assume you do all five Grasshoppers and most races are about $30, that's $150 you save plus the pleasure of sleeping and eating breakfast in your own house. If everyone who came out sent $5o to help with Ross' rehabilitation, he's been making tremendous progress, it would really make a difference. (500x50=25K). Get out and ride!